A dash for glory
You can run, but you certainly can’t hide. At least not if security guard Mike Ellis is after you. As a former 200 m schools sprint champion, 24-year-old Mike is fast carving a reputation as the man that shoplifters fear.
Cerberus has learnt that this astute guard’s latest chase went on for more than a mile through the streets of Leicester before he caught up with thief Julian Carew, who had fled the local Iceland with a stash of coffee jars.
Mike, who works for Reliance Security, cornered his quarry in a nearby park and, despite being punched in the chest, managed to hold him until the police arrived. Carew was subsequently sentenced to three concurrent two-month prison sentences.
According to Mike, not many of his ‘victims’ get away. “The shoplifters know me now, and tend to stop running when they see who’s chasing them”. Quite right, too.
At any rate, Cerberus is delighted to report that at least one of the UK’s former sprint kings is putting his skills to good use by catching criminals. After all, until Linford Christie’s multiple triumphs, most of our fleet-footed wonders had trouble catching a cold.
The comeback kings
In the late 1970s they were streetwise cops, fighting crime in the US as they cruised the LA streets in their red and white Ford Torino.
Now, though, Cerberus can reveal that TV detectives Starsky and Hutch are planning a comeback – but this time on opposite sides of the law.
Stars Paul Michael Glaser (Starsky) and David Soul, who played lady-crazy Hutch, told your ever-faithful canine friend that they want to make a film in which the buddies clash at riots between environmentalists and big businesses.
If all goes according to plan, Starsky would be the security chief for a major corporation attending free trade talks in Seattle. Hutch, meanwhile, would be leading a pack of ‘greenies’ bent on attacking capitalist bastions including the major burger chains.
Sounds plausible, but before the cameras roll Cerberus will discreetly remind Starsky that flares have gone out of style. Trouser security at the ankles, you see, is a whole lot tighter these days.
Thief caught…in the nick!
Waiting rooms are depressing places at the best of times. A bit like a prison cell with ‘extras’. You wouldn’t expect a thief to be caught in one, though, and certainly not in a police station.
Well, it’s happened. An ‘insider’ at Greater Manchester Police has let slip to Cerberus that detectives recently caught an ‘escaped’ shoplifter on the strength of waiting room CCTV pictures. Apparently, 23-year-old Pete Smith had wandered into the police station to speak with the desk sergeant about another matter, having forgotten all about his past misdemeanour. He’d slipped the net…or so he thought.
Caught on camera and subsequently recognised by a discerning officer, Smith was brought before the judiciary and sentenced to 28 days in prison.
Cerberus feels the young man’s plight may have been far worse, though. He could have ended up in a bus station waiting room instead, and sat there just as long under the mistaken impression that the No 32 to Moss Side would actually show up…
Under lock and key
A prison officer who lost his keys has cost the taxpayer GB pound 500,000 for a new set of locks. Among the missing bunch was the master key to Liverpool’s renowned Walton Prison, where more than 1,500 hardened criminals are detained at Her Majesty’s Pleasure.
Not surprisingly, fears of a mass break-out at the Category B stronghold prompted bosses to sanction the costly refit. Otherwise, Cerberus suspects, it would have been the UK’s first prison to adopt an ‘open door’ policy for ‘outmates’.
It’s good to talk
An influential coalition of organisations including the National CCTV Users’ Group and English Heritage has joined forces with the Civic Trust to denounce ‘full face’ advertising on 20,000 of BT’s ‘phone boxes across the UK.
Concerned CCTV operators are fearful that would-be vandals cannot be seen behind the adverts, while innocent callers are actively precluded from finding out who’s lurking around outside under cover of darkness.
Just the other day, Cerberus caught sight of one of the offending adverts on his way to the pooch clinic. It depicted a ‘lifesize’ caricature of Bob The Builder.
It’s too late to salvage the Christmas No 1 for a proper band, but can Cerberus still fix him? Let the pooch off the leash…Bob would need more than a talking tractor to rescue his joints if our canine friend was on the prowl…
